You and me, we're history
So, Rez HD is out. And I have no 360. And lots of people are starting to talk and blog and Twitter about it and IT'S ABSOLUTELY KILLING ME.
Partly that's because I want to see what it's like and blow an entire night of sleep unlocking the last level but partly it's because I'm wondering - WHERE THE FUCK WERE ALL OF YOU 6 YEARS AGO?
I get a feeling that Rez is like the infamous Sex Pistols gig at the Lesser Free Trade Hall in Manchester in 1976 - if everyone who claims now to have loved Rez the first time round had actually bought it then it would have been one of the best selling games of all time.
Eurogamer have given it a 10/10 but gave the original 8/10. Likewise C&VG gave it 9.0 and gave the original 7.0 (actually they gave the PS2 version 7.0 - they didn't even bother reviewing the Dreamcast version).
Part of me wonders why I like Rez so much - when you strip it down it's Space Harrier (or Panza Dragoon Orta) with wireframe graphics and an Ken Ishi/Adam Freeland trance soundtrack. Then another part says that ignoring the totality of aesthetics is stupid - like saying that Metamorphosis of Narcissus is just a painting of some rocks and some ants or an iPod is just an MP3 player with a wheel. Hell, if we're heading down that route then isn't Halo just a game with story elements from Ender's Game and Ringworld and level design that boils down to "Take this map you just done and do it backwards"? Of course there's a third part of me that says "Mmm, bacon" but that part of me is just kind of omnipresent.
But saying Rez is Space Harrier is like saying Space Giraffe is like Tempest. Sure, superficially it is. But you either get it or you don't and if you don't then, cool, ok. I won't mock you. Openly.
So I remain conflicted and console-less and inconsolable and if this teaches some people some video game taste or persuades Mizuguchi to do more games on non handheld consoles then I'm all for it.
But next time I tell you a game is good then listen to me and save yourself 6 years.
Comments
Also, where can I play Space Giraffe? Everyone has been talking about it lately and I feel like I'm quite out of the loop...
A word of warning - it's trippy. And hard. And challenging as in the game mechanic is way weird. It's not just like normal Tempest. For a start there's some extra game play mechanics (called Bulling) that change the way you have to play.
And did I mention it's trippy? By later levels it looks more like a cross between music visualiser (it's based on the same engine as the 360's inbuilt music visualiser) and what happens when you feed pigeons multi-coloured rice and confetti. You physically can't see what's going on. You have to hear what's going on.
It's not easy going. It's been described as James Joyce's "Ulysees".
As for playing it on the projector at work - hell yes. I still haven't given up on doing a whip round for an office one.
Roger that about the office xbox!
It's just the gorgeous HDness, that's all.
I still can't get on with Space Giraffe - my poor brain can't process all the shiny goings on at the same time as not going "oooh! pretty!" at all the visualisations in the background.